No, you are not going crazy. Men are lying (at least on surveys) — and there’s evidence to back it up
Last Saturday, I was getting ready to go on a Hinge date with Ben. We had matched a few weeks prior, exchanged the classic get-to-you-know texts, and he told me he had made a reservation to go bowling that night. We confirmed our plans in the afternoon, yet, half an hour before the data, I received a text;
“hey im sorry to do this but do you mind if we reschedule?”
Yes, he texts in lowercase. I should’ve known. He never followed up to reschedule, and a few days later, I realized he had unmatched with me on Hinge. Why make the plan in the first place when it seems like it was never going to happen? Why lie?
Unfortunately, this pattern extends beyond my personal dating life. Research has shown that men lie more than women, even going as far as to say that men engage in black lies — those that benefit the liar at the expense of another person — at higher rates than women.
To investigate these gender differences in dishonesty, I analyzed data from the 2018–2022 Cooperative Election Studies (CES), which surveys tens of thousands of Americans annually on political attitudes and behaviors. A key feature of the CES for this piece is its vote validation process, which compares respondents’ claims about voting with official voting records. This allowed me to measure precisely how often respondents overreported voting. Building on this, I compared other self-reported responses from the CES against official sources, including the 2022 5-year American Community Survey, the Uniform Crime Report, America’s Blood Centers, and FedScope.
What we see is striking but perhaps unsurprising: men overreport voting by 39.5 percentage points, while women overreport by 35.2 percentage points. To be fair, both genders claim to vote at higher rates than they actually do, but men’s claims diverge from reality more significantly than women’s.
Men appear more likely to present an idealized version of themselves as engaged citizens, even when their ballot-box behavior tells a different story. This tendency to inflate civic participation may stem from a desire to be perceived as informed and politically active without putting in the actual effort of voting. It’s easier to claim participation than to make time for it on Election Day. The same imagination that turns a 5'9" man into 6' on dating apps apparently works overtime when men report their voting behavior.
While we can confirm that specific individuals are lying about voting through these validated records, we should acknowledge that for other metrics, such as blood donation, college enrollment, or crime victimization, the discrepancies might theoretically be explained by sampling differences. It’s possible, though unlikely, that the CES simply captured an unusually high proportion of male blood donors compared to national averages.
Blood donations show the largest gender disparity and trend of overreporting. Men overreport blood donation by 11 points versus women’s 7.6 points. This substantial difference, in combination with vote overreporting, suggests that men may be particularly prone to claiming participation in altruistic behaviors that enhance their social image. The fact that blood donations represent both personal sacrifice and community benefit likely makes it an especially attractive area for men to exaggerate about.
What’s even more revealing is that men who claim to be blood donors overreport their voting by 35.7 percentage points, compared to non-blood donors who overreport by 28.9 percentage points. This is the smoking gun. If these were just innocent sampling variations, we wouldn’t see such a clear pattern where the individuals who claim to donate blood are more likely to lie about voting. This confirms what I already suspected — these aren’t just statistical anomalies or honest mistakes, they’re deliberate lies.
Men of all ages overreport college degrees and enrollment at higher rates than women, with women actually underreporting degree attainment by 0.03 percentage points while men overreport by 0.46 percentage points. Education directly translates to perceived intelligence and earning potential — two attributes deeply tied to the idea of masculinity and success. Men may feel particular pressure to appear intellectually accomplished, even when they haven’t put in the work, and lying about having a degree likely feeds their egos.
Military and federal employment statistics tell a similar story. Men overreport military service by 0.61 percentage points (compared to women’s 0.30) and federal employment by 0.69 points (versus women’s 0.13). These prestigious positions symbolize authority, patriotism, and public service — attributes traditionally associated with a masculine identity. Claiming these roles, even falsely, offers a shortcut to respect without requiring actual service or commitment.
Crime victimization data reveals an interesting pattern. Men overreport being victims of crime by 1.45 percentage points, compared to women’s, essentially zero, 0.05 points. This doesn’t immediately fit with projecting strength or superiority — after all, being a victim isn’t typically seen as empowering.
Perhaps it’s less about appearing strong and more about appearing significant or interesting. Being the subject of a crime creates a narrative where this man is the central character in a dramatic story. It might be less about heroism and more about importance — a way of saying “things happen to me.”
The data on military service and federal employment reveals similar patterns of male overreporting. Men overreport military service by 0.61 percentage points compared to women’s 0.30, and federal employment by 0.69 percentage points versus women’s 0.13. These institutions carry significant social prestige and represent service to country — qualities that align with traditional masculine ideals of duty, patriotism, and public service. Claiming association with these respected institutions, even falsely, offers men a shortcut to the social status and recognition these roles confer without requiring the actual sacrifice or commitment. This pattern further reinforces the tendency for men to construct idealized personas around service and civic duty that don’t match reality.
From an early age, boys learn that showing weakness or admitting failure isn’t acceptable. This creates intense pressure to maintain an image of competence and success at all costs. When men exaggerate on surveys or in real life, they’re responding to lifelong messages about what makes them valuable. It becomes easier to claim accomplishments or pretend than to risk the vulnerability of actual participation or the perceived shame of admitting limitations. The last question I have is whether these men realize their responses are anonymous — or if their need to appear exceptional has become so ingrained that they can’t help but lie, even when no one will ever know their name.
